THE 93:20 NEWSLETTER:- ISSUE 20

Hello, and welcome to Issue 20 of the 93:20 Newsletter, and a Happy New Year to you all. Going to be a big one for City, one way or the other. With a new year dawning, I thought it worthwhile (you may disagree) to give my predictions for the twelve months ahead. It was meant to be serious, but that soon fell by the wayside. So here we go – sit back, and enjoy.

The year starts in sensational fashion as Manchester United pull off a famous win at Anfield.

Oh ok, I’ll try and keep my predictions at least slightly plausible from this point onwards.

Alexander Trent-Arnold sensationally decides to stay at Liverpool and signs a new seven-year deal, which was not in any way or form related to numerous death threats that he definitely did not receive from Liverpool fans.

Ange Postecoglou is sacked after the disastrous trialling of a new 2-1-7 formation that ses Van De Ven as an auxiliary striker/ rush goalie.

Jonathan Wilson compares City's poor form to the final days of Rome. Barney Ronay compares City to Hydra, a snake-like water monster who dwelled at the entrance to the Underworld in the Lake of Lemar in the Argolid region. Jonathan Liew makes comparisons to Mrs Brown’s Boys, a step too far for the football club, who begin legal proceedings. 

And then the big new breaks. Manchester City are found not guilty on all charges from the Premier League, though are subject to a £300m fine for non-cooperation. The following day, Miguel Delaney writes a gushing piece for the Independent stating he never doubted their innocence, and that this was a great day for the world of football.

<Name removed for legal reasons> is seen in Piccadilly Gardens shouting at pigeons, waving what he claims is a dossier that proves City’s guilt. This is Piccadilly Gardens, so no one pays him any attention, but he is later hospitalised due to an inhalation of spice fumes.

City release a cryptic statement, a re-working of parts of Rudyard Kipling’s If poem.

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, 
If you can trust yourself when the MEN doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams for Richard Masters
If you can meet with Harris and Tebas
And treat those two impostors just the same; 
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by Talksport to make a trap for fools,

If you can make one heap of all your revenue
And risk it on one turn of Lord Pannick,
And never breathe a word about your loss (off-book);
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with sparse crowds and keep your virtue
Or walk the Kings Road—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, 
If Kyle Walker can once more fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the earth and everything that’s in it, 
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man City fan, my son!

They also sue Talksport.

Lord Pannick buys the Maldives, and retires there. City commission a new statue of Kelechi Ihenacho, Son Jun-Ho and Lord Pannick embracing as they walk down the City tunnel. 

A shaky mobile phone video shows what appears to be Jim Ratcliffe stealing £3.37 of loose change from a busker outside Old Trafford. He later claims from his Monaco residence that whilst the video must be taken “in context”, difficult decisions need to be made, with contributions from all, if United are to return to the top. Mike Keegan later releases an exclusive claiming INEOS were looking to monetise ball boys by making them wear sandwich boards during matches. After a ball boy is hospitalised during trials, the idea is quietly shelved. The boys will sport electronic advertising on their baseball caps and jackets instead.

Pep Guardiola bows to external pressure and brings in Sam Allardyce to sort out the defence. However, he does not last beyond a single game, as an undercover sting by The Mill leads to videos emerging of him drinking pints of wine out of the Thomas Cook trophy in the Crown and Kettle with Moonbeam. He claims the meeting was to discuss marketing opportunities, but his resignation two days later feels inevitable.

Liverpool cruise to a league title, and annoyingly Arne Slot continues to act in a civilised manner. Liverpool fans also act in a dignified manner as expected, but Storm Bert puts a dampener on the trophy parade, though it is still witnessed by two billion people (source: Liverpool Echo, John Aldridge) in Liverpool town centre. Eighteen documentaries and a whole lot of poetry is immediately commissioned. Liverpool.com wonder if Slot may be the greatest Premier League manager of all time.

A hastily-called board meeting at United decides that the only solution to United’s woes is to hire a knight of the realm. There is disagreement on who to call though – Sir Alex Ferguson or Sir Gareth Southgate. The grey hairs begin to appear for Amorim, but INEOS insist he pays for his own Just for Men.

Arsenal finish a credible 2^nd , but AFTV are not happy, and on 17^th May, the entire channel spontaneously combusts, leaving behind only a charred microphone and set of headphones. The There Will Be Blud documentary is released charting their rise and fall.

In a departure from the normal format, Khaldoon Al Mubarak’s end of season interview on City’s site consists of him smiling into the camera without speaking a word, for three hours solid. What looks like a pile of manila folders are positioned next to him.

United stay up with a late penalty to earn a draw at home to Aston Villa. United fans deflect attention as always by reminding the world across social media platforms that Alex Ferguson was the greatest manager ever, so there. United’s performances are described by Roy Keane as **** (rhymes with bank).

Jim Ratcliffe sets up a GoFundMe to raise money to add a second line to the Old Trafford scoreboard.

City are looking to be active in the summer transfer window, until Pep puts his foot down and declares he wants an even smaller squad, and will play 5-a-side teams for the 2025/26 season. City are relegated, but Pep states he is happy with the players’ application more than you believe.

Chelsea are unsurprisingly busy in the transfer market, with 18 new players arriving, and 14 leaving. Todd Boehly buys himself from Chelsea for £84m, and Chelsea pass PSR. United also pass as the Premier League allows for £296m to be wiped off losses and filed under "Other Costs - Shit management." After APT rules are loosened, City announce a £200m sponsorship deal with Vimto. 93:20 Podcaster Howard Hockin puts himself forward as a brand ambassador.

Kyle Walker leaves City for Saudi Arabia, and City mark his contribution to City’s success with a mosaic outside the ground, which appears to show him urinating against a pub wall whilst brandishing the Premier League trophy. Whilst some blues call it a fitting tribute to a great player, others are not happy at the standard of the mosaic work.

City put up season ticket prices by 15%, obviously. They go out of the Club World Cup early, and for once, nobody actually does care.

As Barcelona are forced to sell their new roof so that they can register the catering staff, Mundo Deportivo report that the club is confident of signing Erling Haaland. It's the dawn of a new era, as Juventus, Real Madrid and Barcelona begin life in the new Super League. As the only clubs participating, they will play each other 14 times each season. 

After a large puddle forms during another roof leak at Old Trafford following some persistent drizzle, Jim Ratcliffe hires out rowing boats and charges United fans £15 per hour for their use. United also open a log flume, travelling from roof to pitch side in just four seconds. 

Vinicius Jr has a huge strop after a number of inconsequential events happen (I’m running out of ideas to be honest).

After a broken glass pane is quoted at £3K to repair at Old Trafford, Jim Ratcliffe orders it to be covered up with cardboard. Love United, hate glaziers. This gives Ratcliffe an idea that a new stadium could be made entirely out of cardboard at a fraction of the price, but the idea gains little traction. To make matters worse, the mice around Old Trafford form a union and go on strike, due to poor living conditions. Their complaints include excess surface water, raw chicken, and balls landing in the forecourt on match day.

The 2025/26 season starts with the usual hope, before most of it is quickly dashed. Spurs are three goals up in the North London derby as the game enters injury time, yet somehow contrive to lose. Pep is on patches to stop him scratching his own head, as a slow start to the season once more plays out.

Over at Old Trafford, nothing has changed. Just before Christmas, Jim Ratcliffe is visited by three ghosts.

Manchester United fans march to the ground before a United home match, demanding a Qatari owner takeover. The Megastore is as ever rammed. United are languishing in 16th place in the league but the end of December, despite winning another transfer window. Elsewhere, despite state-owned clubs systematically trying to destroy the sport, football continues on as before, and is as entertaining as ever. 

As for City, they end the year in 3rd position. They go on to win the league by 16 points. Firminho69 on Twitter still maintains Pep is a fraud, and says to be truly great, he should try managing Oldham Athletic.

Or Manchester United. 

Have a great 2025 everyone!  

What We Have Been Up To This Week

THE MARKET:- EPISODE 30

Lloyd is joined by Ahsan and Bailey to deep dive into January transfer strategy at City.

REVIEW OF 2024

Howard, Chris and George look back at the highs and lows of 2024, Another title, new Pep contract, awards, records and the falloff. Plus their hopes for 2025.

THE HUB:- EPISODE 21

Analytics Utd editor Jack Elderton joins Bailey to reflect on the last match against West Ham, preview the weekend fixture, discuss the Paqueta move that fell through, and if Divine Mubama could become City's backup striker.

THE 93:20 REVIEW:- 500 NOT OUT

Ste, Chris and Ahsan look back on a nervy win over Leicester.

FREE FOR ALL ON SOUNDCLOUD

THE WEEKEND SHOW

Ste is joined by Ahsan and Lloyd to chat transfer links, West Ham, plus the rest of the weekend actions.

OPPOSITION FAN

Howard is joined by James Jones to talk all things Hammers, and discuss another club struggling right now.

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